One time, I told one of my children a story that I made up about a zookeeper and a giraffe. It was elaborate in the sense that it chronicled multiple weeks in the life of a particular zookeeper who, while trying to feed the giraffe, kept getting his hand bitten. In my telling of the story, the bites were particularly painful for the zookeeper, causing him to bleed and requiring stitches.

Note: It was only after I made up this story that I learned that giraffes do not have sharp teeth, and that they use their long tongue to collect food, and therefore, are unlikely to bite a zookeeper.

Anyway, in my version of the story, the zookeeper became much more cautious after the first bite. But then after a week of everything being fine, he went back to his normal demeanor – and then the giraffe bit him again. Over time, the giraffe started biting more and more often, moving from once a week to once every other day. And over time, the zookeeper became more and more timid, until he allowed days to go by without feeding the giraffe. The story ended with the giraffe dying of starvation.

As you can guess, the purpose of the story was to dramatize and make memorable the old adage: “don’t bite the hand that feeds you.” I believe that this old saying became popular for a good reason.

There are many relationships in this world that are unequal. Like the zookeeper and the giraffe, one side has much more to gain than the other one does. In those cases, the dependent party must be extra careful in how it treats its benefactor.

One place where this obviously applies is in the realm of parenting. Parents and children are not equals. This is important to remember, especially as we are now living in a society that increasingly expects parents to treat their children as peers.

Relationally, parents and children are on two different levels. Though not always the case, it is usually true that:

Parents give their children Christmas presents;
children (at least the younger ones) do not buy their parents Christmas presents.

Parents provide meals for their children;
children do not provide meals for their parents.

Parents take their kids to school;
children do not take their parents to work.

Parents take their children on vacation with them;
children do not take their parents on vacation with them.

Parents protect their children, providing for the physical safety;
children do not protect their parents.

Parents look out for the overall well-being of their children;
children do not look out for their parents.

I suspect this is one of the reasons why the Bible says: “Honor your mother and father” and “Children, obey your parents in the Lord.” It is because the relationship is unequal that the children owe a kind of honor to their parents – a kind that is not reciprocal.

Note: By “not reciprocal” I don’t mean that parents aren’t supposed to show any kind of respect to their children. I am just pointing out that the Scripture doesn’t say “parents obey your children” for good reason. The way the two parties are to treat each other is not the same.

This becomes an important observation that must be passed down to both parents and children. Children are not to treat their parents as their equals, because those parents are in charge of them. There is a one-sided honor that is essential to the relationship. And parents are not to be treating their children as their equals either; they owe them far more love, supervision, protection, and provision than they owe the next-door neighbors.

Naturally, parents (having lived longer than their children) are more aware of this dynamic than their children are. So, it’s the children who are probably going need this reminder more often.

The Bible says to “honor your father and mother.” And so I think it’s good to point out the practicality of God’s word here. So I say to children (and I’m thinking especially of teenagers right now) it is not practical for you to oppose your parents. When you dishonor your parents, it’s not simply bad for them; it is also not good for you to bite the hand that feeds you.

Also, please notice that all of the above applies to our relationship with God (regardless of whether or not we are parents.) As human beings, we are the dependents, and God is our Benefactor. He is the Father, and we are the children. The relationship is certainly not reciprocal. God does not owe us the honor that we owe Him. And so the grounds for Christian obedience is wrapped up in that.

The apostle Paul said it this way: “Or who has ever first given to [God] and has to be repaid? For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be glory forever.”

It is not practical for any of us to oppose the Lord, our God. Let us all (kids and adults) not bite the hand that feeds us, but rather obey and honor our Lord forever.